Ice Capades come to Edgewood November 2009

Ice Capades come to Edgewood featuring the great, the incredible, the falling star...Lucretia Bittner. Since my shining moment on ice, I have observed the happening through instant replay in my mind. In a kind of out of body experience I have replayed what the scene must have looked like from someone elses view.

Linda and Laurel arrived at our house, and I, with every intention of being a gracious hostess, opened the front door and intended to step out onto the sidewalk to hold the door open for them. As I stepped onto the top step, a greeting to them was expressed, and from there things became slippery to say the least. I don't recall stepping onto the top step. I just know that I was suddenly slithering around on the sidewalk at their feet.

Picture if you will...Linda and Laurel standing there on the sidewalk, suitcase and clothes bag in hand. Watching me slipping and sliding like a beached whale. I'm sure that a beached whale lies there on the sand wishing the ocean would just swallow it up, and with the embarassment of finding itself beached, is longing to be forever back into the depths of the sea. Instead it finds itself, fresh out of ocean, surrounded by Save The Whale people, pushing and proding it, all in the name of good works.

There I was on the sidewalk, slipping, sliding and slithering, with no hope of traction, upon the ice. There stood Linda and Laurel, suddenly becoming the Save the Lucretia people. Only they weren't pushing and proding. They were staring in wonder at the teeming mass of me, groping around for traction at their feet. I heard their voices from what seemed far above me, inquiring of my well being, but what could they do? They had their hands full of luggage, and their minds full of thoughts such as, "Oh please don't let that be me, slipping around on the ice at the feet of someone else, looking for all the world like an idiot."

I assured them that I was fine, while wondering if I was in fact fine. Of course I was fine. Why wouldn't I be fine? Falling from the icy top step onto the skating rink below was just a quick turn around the rink. As soon as I could get myself up, with much sliding of the hands and feet, I was up and acting like the graceful person that I am. I'm such kidder! Allow me to slip, slide and slither at your feet. Humility is my middle name! No worries. I just have a mild case of ice rash on my hand, a colorful bruise on my left shin, and a small bruise on my right knee. It could have been worse. It could have been Kelvin and Carl at whose feet I fell.

Cretia